CDAN: 11/18/06

Monday, December 18, 2006

This one took me awhile to write because of its sensitive nature. You will discover that for yourself when you read it. I also want to say in advance that nothing has been proved and at this point the investigation continues.

A woman came into the office for her first appointment. I guessed she was in her 40's but it is always hard to tell in LA. I did not recognize her last name because she was using her maiden name. When she said her ex-husband’s name, I did a double take. I honestly did not know he had been married prior to his current marriage, let alone had other children. He (singer/actor B lister on a very good day and is currently on a hit tv show, lets call him "M.")

They had been divorced for quite some time when she came into the office. You could tell by looking at her that she had once been attractive, but she was not going to age well. She looked like the years since the divorce were taking their toll on her. She came into the office because she wanted to change the custody and visitation agreement she currently had with M.

The reason for the change was their daughter. For many years M and his daughter ("D") had a very close relationship. That relationship changed somewhat as his children that he lived with grew older. For some reason, the relationship with D was turning into something less father/daughter and more into something less innocent.

D is a lovely girl in her mid-teens. She was always outgoing and bright and got along well with everyone. Over the past year though she had grown withdrawn and seemed quiet and lonely. She was acting differently towards her mother and also dressing in a manner which did not scream innocence, but rather something more slutty and trashy. D’s mom thought at first this was just a teenager thing and that D would soon move on into something else.

When things did not get any better and D was becoming more and more popular with boys, mom tried to get D to see a psychiatrist. This did not work out. D did not want to open up to strangers. Nothing was working, and D was becoming more and more withdrawn. Mom was worried that D might attempt suicide as D seemed so depressed.

Then, one night out of the blue before D was scheduled to see her dad for the weekend, she confided to her mom that she did not want to see her dad then or ever again. D broke down and told her mom that about a year ago she woke up during the night and found M looking at her and touching himself while she was sleeping. He had pulled off her covers and was staring at her. M apologized and left the room quickly. Nothing more was said about it until the next time D visited. That weekend, M spent time with D alone and explained to her how he felt about her and that he just could not help himself. He thought of her as a woman and not his daughter. At first D was flattered because her dad had been spending more time with his other kids. She was special to dad. M wanted to show D how special she was and so over the next few months he proceeded to not only do what he had done the first night she awakened, but also made her perform sexual acts on him and he had sex with her.

D had not told anyone because she enjoyed the extra attention she was getting. She wanted to be the best for her dad so she started having sex with other boys so she could practice with them. The problem was, she did not like the person she was becoming, and so one day, she just stopped. At that point her dad became violent and tried to force himself on her. She ran away from him and feigned illness so that her step-mom would take her home. She had not been back, and this upcoming weekend would have been her first time back since the episode. She just decided she was not going to take it anymore.

Mom did not let her go over to M’s house that weekend and then came into the office to make sure D never had to go back. D is old enough to where she never has to go back if she does not want to and she has no intention to do so. M has actually gone to court to try and convince the court that he should be able to spend time with his daughter even if it is supervised. The full allegations made by D were never in the court filings. Only the first episode is mentioned, and it was made more PG in the filing. D and her mom want to handle this themselves and do not want the attention thrust on them that a full investigation would produce. However, they also wanted to make sure the other children were safe that were still living in the house. Therefore mom made an anonymous call to CPS and that investigation is continuing but as far as I know has not produced anything or it would have DEFINITELY come out.

M has always denied everything that happened and promises to sue if anything is ever released publicly. He said anything that did happen was just a misunderstanding. It must be said that Mom and D did not get anything out of this. There is no extra child support coming or spousal support. D just wanted to get away from her dad.